E! Online has reported that Darren Criss, the Team StarKid and Glee crooner, was offered – and politely turned down – a hosting gig on X-Factor.
I don’t know about you, guys, but this is proof to me that Darren’s quick rise hasn’t left him light-headed. Several things would happen with him as a host on X-Factor:
- The public would get tired of him existing on their screens and not performing
- Overexposure to rival J. Lo’s nip slip
- An instant, public, and oft-repeated note that Darren, while excellent, has been in the “biz” for all of three seconds, and judgments on possible recording artists are a bit… thin on the ground. Thin in the air. Just generally, pretty trim. PS: He’d be a host, so, you know, not judging at all. EVEN WORSE. Shall we compare him to Brian Dunkelman now?
Even more noticeable, I think, is that he was asked at all. What are the X-Factor producers getting at? Have all the headshots of promising young emcee types been whisked out of their offices by the Hamburgler? No one knew Ryan Seacrest when Idol started. Give a new kid a break.
(That said, last year’s host was ABOMINABLE. I won’t even deign to look up his name. He had one question: “HOW DOES IT FEEL?” When you can get my own mother heckling a host after each performance, you know it’s bad.)
And regarding the new judges or lack thereof: is there no one left in the recording business who can give solid, useful feedback without being a useless, platitude-repeating plush doll (Randy Jackson) or annoying as hell (Kara DioGuardi) or seemingly high (Paula Abdul) or a tear-faced wreck after every song (Nicole Shitakemushrooms)?
They should just leave it all to Simon. He’s the only one anyone listens to anyway.
*P.S. love to Michael Slezak for the Nicole S renaming trend. In the past he has called her “Sherbertflavors,” which is my favorite.
