Not having the CW on my television is a severe inconvenience, hence why the recap is so late.
You know what else is a severe inconvenience? A filler episode only 3 weeks into the new season! (So take that)
So I wrote maybe 75% of the recap as I normally do – going through the scenes and adding hilarious and snarky commentary. The reason I had to stop was because of how pointless this episode was – I simply could not will myself into continuing.
The sad part is that review wise, this wasn’t a bad episode. Not even close to the worst the show has come up with (anyone else remember Bugs?) But the timing of it (too early and just after last week’s emotional bombshell), and the decision to put ZERO season long information into the episode was a bad one.
In fact the episode only had one FLASHBACK and, are you ready for this, it was one about Sam. Lasted all of 90 seconds and was all shiny and bright and reeked of a Pantene commercial. It showed Sam getting a surprise birthday picnic in the park with Amelia and Riot (which is a great name for a dog you almost killed.) It was stupid, and pointless, and moose-related, and completely unbelievable. And I don’t mean unbelievable in a figurative way – I mean I simply have yet to see any reason why Sam would have such an attachment to this woman. And don’t tell me it’s cause she made him a birthday cake. I find it unlikely that not once did Dean make or at least steal little Sammy a cake when they were growing up; not when it was all Dean did to look after his baby brother.
Supernatural has done Sam’s love life well a grand total of twice. First was with Jess (poor Jess) and how devastated he was after her murder. It made sense – the way in which he responded and the amount of time it took him to get over it. The other instance was in Season 2′s Heart in which Sam meets and quickly falls in love with a female werewolf. While the two barely know each other, for whatever reason, their passion and instant connectivity is so entirely convincing that the ending of the episode is in my top 3 cry-worthy moments of the series. I’m not kidding. 1. Death’s Door 2. Swan Song 3. Heart. Jared Padalecki is brilliant in that one and his last shot kills me every damn time. So we know a good Sam romance is possible – they just haven’t found one recently.
Then there’s the retirement shaming that went on, reminiscent of season 1′s college shaming. Dean came off as more and more needy and pathetic every time he tried to explain to his brother why hunting is the best and why the two of them only needed each other. I get that Dean just went through a lot of stuff and potentially that’s why he was extra clingy, but, um… THEY HAVEN’T SHOWN US WHAT HAPPENED YET!
That would be the proper timing for this episode. Get us a story-advancing episode where we see severe abandonment come into play for Dean. Then air this monster of the week one. Where it’s all about getting back to basics and the thrill of the chase and scenes of Dean desperately trying to convince his brother how great the two of them have it. That would have worked.
This did not.
I’m looking forward to next week quite a bit, hopefully it’ll be one I’m excited to properly recap for you.
Carry on.

